how did you catch your spouse cheating, i need help?
Really I dont even know where to beging. I have no one really to talk to, because my best friend, the only one that I could talk to, we arent getting along anymore, and I’m not "that" close with my friends. Anyway for a few months now I have just been having a gut feeling that my husband of almost 2 years is cheating. I love him dearly and I try my best to make him feel important and loved, but lately it feels like its not good enough. I’m a stay at home mom to a 2 yrld old and pregnant again with baby #2. I clean, I cook, i let him hang out with his friends, or let his friends come over anytime he wants, and i know this is tmi but he even gets it "sex" anytime he wants. And he ALWAYS acts satisfied after. But lately he has been coming home later, says he’s working late, he always tries to start a fuss with me, and i’m always the blame, and as soon as he does come home he goes straight to playing his xbox til like 12 or 1 at night. He doesnt even play with our 2 yld tht much, and i never thought he wld had been like tht with our children, cause his daddy left him as a baby, and my daddy was not good to me at all growing up. I just feel so broken, i love him more than life itself, and i wld do anything to have it back to the way it use to be. But i honestly think he has something going on with a girl at his work. but i have no proof, other than following my heart.
btw; this may be a dead give away that he is cheating, and its another reason why i think he is, becos he is always tlkn ab doing a 3 sum, after i told him i wasnt interested in that. i want him and only him.
my questions is; what are some dead give aways that a man is cheating, how to catch them??
thank you all for you honest help. im glad i didnt get any negative feed back on my behalf because i feel like im not doing anything wrong to cause him for acting this way, however i seen where someone wrote, we should had been together and got to know each other before kids. We was together for 5 years before then. I guess after 5 years, we thought it was time for marriage, but i guess that was a BAD idea for how i feel.
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By reading your story, comments, it seems to me that you already know the answer to all of your questions. Your intuition is your best "girlfriend", she will never lie. It’s also got to be hard being pregnant with all those hormones going off.
I had feelings for many months myself until I used a book, cd set that I found to help me figure out the best ways to catch him in the act. I had to have proof for myself and also ultimately the lawyers!
If you need to talk personally, I’ve been there. Also, attached link of what helped me.
luskranch@yahoo.com (put cheating spouse in subject line so I dont delete on accident)
He is cheating. He also has no respect for you if he is talking about a threesome. Leave the scum.
all of them are
My friend put a recorder under his seat in the car when he dropped her off from work. She also hired someone (a friend) to follow him and call her when they were together so she could confront them.
They have since worked it out and are still married 4 years later….(Ew)
It sounds to me that you already know and what I can suggest is to bring out into the open. Tell him that you have a feeling of him cheating and that things are distant between the two of you and if he doesn’t tell you that you are going to get a divorce. I hate to say this but, you should have gotten to know your husband first before you had children. I tell this to my clients all the time, get to know each other first and then have children so that you can avoid what is happening to you now. Get your info right away with him, let him tell you TODAY! Good Luck
the threesome thing is definetly the dead give away. a private investigator can do the trick
Your own intuition is the best way to tell when something is wrong, if you can feel it its probably going on. when a man is cheating on you he often will come home to you and pick fights, and fault find because he really doesn’t want to be there. I had certain warnings that my ex was cheating, he just didn’t seem interested in me anymore. when a man is cheating you will see certain changes, they won’t be as talkative with you, they try to avoid you, and no matter how good a wife you are it won’t matter. When they disrespect you or name call, or if they spend allot of time on their personal appearance, or go into a different room to talk on the phone. trouble is they rarely will admit to it, and you would have to get someone to follow him sometime to see where he goes. your heart will warn you when something is wrong, and it never lies.
try checking his phone or getting a baby sitter for the child go to his work and see what time he stop work and hide see who he come out with where he go that only way u can know as he not letting much out does he still need sex same as before or not that other way to tell
One night you tell him that you and the kids are staying at your parents because your mom and Dad aren’t getting along. YOu take the kids over there and you rent a car and use a wig and follow him. You can do it that way or you can hire a private investigator and they could help you out!! Most the time you
can ask him if he is okay. Just talking can help and maybe looking sexy once any a while wouldn’t hurt!
If he hides things from you like call history, internet passwords, and can’t be reached when he is out, he is cheating. On the other hand, pregnancy can cause hormone surges and depression. Try talking. Let him know how you feel, and then see what happens.
I feel for you and this is what you can do. Just send some one to monitor him closely. Get a friend who you will trust and tell him/her to go after him especially after work so he could get to see what he always does after work.
You can also check his messages in his phone while he is asleep. What you can also do is to e very cold. I mean cold. Just behave for sometime as if he doesn’t exist. You do not appreciate something until you loose it. That should haunt him. He will come confessing to you. The person he may be seeing will never treat him as well as you do.
Sorry to break it you sweety, but it definitely sounds as if he is cheating. Stand up for yourself and don’t kiss his ass when he acts up. Be a stand up girl, leave him alone (I know that’s hard but it’ll make him wonder what you’re up to), and respect yourself. He is taking advantage of you because you are so good to him. The dominating person in a relationship is the one who doesn’t care… he’s not caring and you’re letting him run everything.
If you dig enough at anything you will find something that you do not like. With that being said, it sounds to me based on what you are saying that he is already cheating on you, it makes it easier for a cheater to face you by picking fights with you and making it hard to be around you, if they were to come home to an immaculate home and a loving wife, what self justification would they have for their actions. Get out now!
you will catch him in little lies,he starts having sex with you differently,keeping e mails a secret his cell phone look at the bill the numbers he has called and received show up at work for a surprise lunch date see how he reacts and this other woman also and don’t let him know you suspect him cheating or he will never let his guard down and him wanting a threesome is not a good sign i assume he was wanting another woman for the threesome ask who he had in mind then you will know he is wanting to have sex with this woman also do you smell perfume on him that’s not yours does he go straight to the shower when he comes in from working late or a night out with his buddies if so he is getting rid of the Evidence so you wont suspect anything is he dressing differently cutting his hair differently working out more more worried about his appearance than before if so he is trying to keep her interested in him and the last thing you can always follow him or get someone else to and get pictures for proof
First let me say im sorry for the pain you are going through, nothing hurts worse than a broken heart. probably the cheapest and easiest thing to do is go to walmart and get a $25.00 voice activated digital recorder and put it under his drivers seat so that it wont slide out, then retrieve it in about a week or so, you can hear his side of his cell phone conversations while hes in the car. Then of course you can go online and type in cheating spouses or spy programs and there are lots of programs to bug his cell phone, you can record both sides of his conversation and retrieve his text messages, sent and received, however those cost from $100.00 to$500.00 bucks. He may not have done anything, other than being bored and that happens to everyone, I wonder how he would feel if you agreed to a 3some, but with a guy as the third party? those things never, ever strengthen a marriage, they only make you feel that much more empty. sounds like he still thinks hes single, but he made a very grown up promise that is legally binding, and he has 2 human lives on this earth, he is no longer a child, he is an adult with adult responsibility’s and its time for him to grow up! I wish i had a better answer for you, but its so complicated, try not to let your imagination drive you crazy, cause it will, you cant and shouldn’t accuse him of anything without having proof, good luck to you,im sure it will work out, and believe it or not talking to your creator helps a lot! He is real you know, and he knows exactly what you are feeling. feel free to send me an update if you want ,steve.