Why does my wife get angry at me when I cheat on her?
My wife cheated on me about 2 years ago. She didn’t admit to cheating at first, but she eventually fessed up when she realized that her own best friend was the person who told me what happened. My wife claimed that she was drunk when she cheated and didn’t know what she was doing. I did not believe her, because even if you get drunk you still know what you are doing. You may do things you wouldn’t have done otherwise when you are drunk, but you still are aware of your actions.
Anyhow, ever since then I haven’t trusted at her at all. I was faithful to her before that happened, but afterward I started cheating on numerous times over the past 2 years. My wife recently found out about one affair and she went bonkers. She is really upset and angry at me.
Does my wife have any right to be angry at me, considering her action was what forced me into cheating on her? Shouldn’t I be able to have "fun" on the side since my wife apparently did too?
Shouldn’t her actions at least give me one free pass?
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Yes, I understand that what she did was wrong, but this goes back to school lessons: just because someone did something to you doesn’t mean you can do it back to them.
She does have a right to be angry- as did you- but you did not have the right to "have ‘fun’ on the side" because "since my wife apparently did too" is not a good enough reason. Sounds to me like you two need to get together and talk about this. Why did that force you into cheating on her? Why did she cheat in the first place? And so on. Maybe you need to see a counselor or other mentor(s), maybe you just need a weekend away together.
Two years is a long time to still not be trusting someone; perhaps she’s hurt from not being trusted for that long. I can understand the whole "not trusting" thing, but for two years?! I would also be upset and angry.
Yes, she does because you obviously forgace her and now you are changing the rules of engagement on her. If you don’t want to be with her then leave here. Don’t stay with her and make her feel like less than a person because of your own selfish reasons.
Sounds to me like ya’ll dont have a healthy relationship at all.
It’s not ok for either of u to cheat.
U should’ve left her when u found out what she did.
U never know, she might end up doing it again….
No offense, but that’s a horrible reaction to realizing that your wife cheated on you. You have a strange marriage.
No, marriage doesn’t work that way. If you wanted fun on the side you should have divorced her when she cheated. Now it’s simply too late. Also too late to save this mess.
Because you claimed that you forgave her and wanted to work things out by staying with her. You didn’t forgive her, you just wanted to get revenge on her. Any normal person who wouldn’t forgive their wife would just divorce them. You wanted to be immature and get your revenge. Get a divorce and stop ruining eachother’s lives. She does have a right to be angry. Maybe she was trying to change her ways and be a different person. I think that makes you a hypocrite, don’t you?
She’s a hypocrite. She was wrong, you decided not to leave, and now you’re wrong.
It doesn’t make it right, but it makes your train wreck of a relationship even…almost. Looks like she’ll need to cheat again and again to make it truly even.
LMFAO, dude, get mental help.
Yes, she has a right to be angry with you, no, two wrongs don’t make a right.
You did exactly what you were angry at her for.
You should have just worked out your problems instead.
two wrongs do not make a right,
How many guys cheated on their wife and when their wife cheated on them then their world became upside down,
just because you cheat on someone it does not lessen the feeling of your counterpart doing the same to you.
That is the reason why you both should keep your pants on unless it is with each other.
wow thats low not to be mean but she might be really sorry about wat she did and being drunk really does affect judgement you shouldnt cheat just because she made a mistake…. hope that helps
sounds like you both need to sit down and talk. There is a lot more going on than just trust.
hahaha ur funny , If you cheated on her and she cheated on you then u cant realy love each other that much , get a divorce m8.
2 wrongs don’t make it right
no,2 wrongs dont make a right..sounds like she didnt like it being done to her,but it also sounds like niether one of you take marrige seriously.if you need to cheat-get a divoce and stay single..
This keeping score attitude will get you nowhere.You two need to get a divorce,or get into some major marriage counseling.
If she cheated on you, then you have a cheating whore as a wife. How the hell do you forget or forgive something like that. FYI, American wives are rated #1 most likely to cheat on their husbands. Ditch the wife and find a non-American one.
both of u r definately wrong. she hldnt have cheated on u in da first place, and u shldnt b cheatin on her now. u both shld b faithful 2 each other. u both shld b devoted 2 each other and nobody else, otherwise, u 2 shldnt b 2getherat all. if u 2 are married, u both took a vow 2 b faithful 2 each other, not the other way. both of u r wrong.
Dude you just want us to validate that what you did was forced onto you by your wife doing it first. WTF ever. Sounds like you both need to be divorced because you don’t love each other enough to be faithful and true to one another.
……………..
Oh, and another thing how is it that your wife had one brief cheat that can justify in your mind you having cheated "on numerous times over the past 2 years" you got even with her the first time you did it
Go back to your trailer and tell her she is so ridiculous for being ANGRY that her HUSBAND is cheating… Seriously? What is wrong with her? What kind of a psychotic wife gets mad at her husband for cheating?
Are you sick freaks not afraid of the diseases you might be bringing into that thing you call a "marriage"?
Sounds like you both have issues and lack maturity. This ain’t healthy, divorce is in your future because the trust and respect went out the window a long time ago.
Your apparently giving too much credit for this drunken encounter. She may not have found it much fun at all and really not worth mentioning. If you feel forced to do something, it should either be to decide to save your ‘marriage’ or go your own separate ways. You have spent two years not trusting the woman your married to and now she is angry at you and no longer trusts you . . . what kind of marriage is that?!?
You need to let it go or move on. Seriously. Holding something like that over her head has the potential to destroy a marriage. If you forgave her and told her you had…then doing something like this now and saying "oh well you did it then so it’s ok" would give her every reason to be mad. Switch it around…if you stopped cheating and got back to ya’lls life together, would you be mad if 3 years down the road she went on a cheating spree? and she did it once…and though it was wrong to keep it hidden, she recognized her error. You’re saying you had multiple affairs….to get her back for one. Knowing what you’re going into before it even happens. Yeah…she has the right. You’d be mad too, you can’t deny that…even if it isn’t as mad. Forgive or leave.
She has a right to be mad but she started all this so just tell her she can get happy in the same pants she got mad in.
And you have the right too cheat , she started it so you have the right too finish it.
ummm why are you with her if she cheated on you. If you want other people to respect you then you need to in turn respect yourself.
and tit for tat isn’t the way to go about gaining respect or trust.
your relationship is doomed. unless you both can fix the trust issues the passion issues and the communication.
Ok…your even..now go back to being a faithful and loving husband…JERK!
Im guessing you never heard " Two wrongs don’t make a right ". She didn’t force you into cheating, you did. If you couldn’t get over it or get counseling, you divorce. You don’t stay with a person you can not trust or forgive.
you are a jerk. If you couldn’t get past her infidelity then you should have moved on. Two wrongs (or several in your words) don’t make a right.
ok yes she has the right to be mad at you, you are playing games you guys both dont really love eachother if you did you wouldnt have cheated and she wouldnt have cheated either if you really love the person you cant even imagin being with anyone eles
Did you think there would be no consequences ? did you give her hell when she did it ?
She did NOT FORCE YOU into cheating. You decided to do it all by yourself. Either for revenge, or because you took her single one-time infidelity as PERMISSION. for you to do the same.
Her doing it once when she was drunk is a totally different story from you doing it numerous times on purpose, sober.
Maybe one time when you were drunk she’d forgive, as being "square" with what she did. You know very well what YOU are doing is way way more than she did.
You also say you don’t trust her at all now. What does that have to do with YOU cheating? since when does not trusting someone make YOU untrustworthy?
You’re just making excuses for being a heel. She has every right to be angry with you about it.
Yes she has a right to be very angry and upset she made a mistake and admitted it what you did was way over the top and inappropriate.
She has just as much right to be angry with you as you were with her. When you accepted her after knowing about the affair, the slate should have been wiped clean. Two wrongs doesn’t make a right. Stop trying to blame someone else for your own poor judgment. Instead of cheating to get revenge, you should have been trying to find out what was wrong in the marriage that made her cheat. You both need to find out what made you cheat and work on that. If you have cheated numerous times, you need to decide if you want to be married or not. If you plan to continue to be a whore then divorce her so she is not taking the chance of getting a sexually transmitted disease from you. Then you need to grow up and take responsibility for your own actions.
Did you think you could forgive her if you were guilty of the same action?
Hey geniuses, two wrongs don’t make a right, but you know what? One wrong doesn’t make a right either. Think about that. There is no right reaction to getting cheated on. When she cheated, she opened the relationship up to unpredictable reactions, up to and including him cheating back. That’s the risk SHE took when she cheated. Now the ball is in her court, and she can either leave, propose they both stop cheating, or cheat again herself. And if this guy doesn’t like the one she picks, he has no one to blame but himself, because his cheating opens up…you guessed it…unpredictable reactions.