I AM HAVING BAD INSTICTS ABOUT MY BOYFRIEND,I THINK HE IS CHEATING ON ME AND HE DONT EVEN WANT US TO TALK BOUT?
i have been dating this guy for almost a year.he has been my only love though he thought i was cheating on him.there was a time when things went wrong when he find out that i was seeing my exboyfriend!the thing was i was still struggling to settle things with my ex and he was out of control and he threatens to kill me and himself,besides he owe me bucks of money which i was to collect at his place.i told my current boyfriend all this and he told me that i should forget about getting my things back form my ex.i believed him but i went to my ex to find out his decisions.i did not have a problem with my ex and he told me that he has given up and i should move on with boyfriend since he can see that i love him.i confessed everything that happened to my boyfriend even about all that had happened to me before we date.i dont know if this was not a good idea because he end up telling me tht he dont think he will ever trust me cauz am always horny and i could keep on checking anybody i used to date in his absence.today is payback because i saw him with the other girl during lunch time.the day before this could happen someone called and he was not in,so i decided to pick the phone after the person calling was calling time and again.the caller was so impolite and she denied to tell me her name and the message,but she demanded to talk to the owner and told me to never answer the phone caus is not mine.i was so shocked!i noted the no. down.i ignored all that but when my boyfriend arrived i told him but he was so furious.later he told me that it was his sister because she him,but to my amazement he rubbed the no. off where i wrote it.i couldnt believe him.at night someone called and he was so down after the mysterious call.i was going to lunch at home but he told me that he will come home after sometime he will find me there.when i looked back i saw him with the girl.i was so hurt i i noted everything in my diary when i arived home.he saw that and he respond by saying there is fairness in life,i have hurt him cheating on him and helping me through thick and thin,what was idoing with other boyfriends cauz he was giving me everything by then.his last words were that he pray tht my stream of life could not dry!I M WONDERING IF HE REALLY LOVES ME!OR IS HE FED UP WITH ME OR HE IS REVENGING BUT STILL HE DOESNT WANT TO SEE ME WITH ANY MAN BECAUZ THIS HURT HIM.YESTERDAY BEFORE HE LEFT TO HIS APARTMENT THERE WAS SOMETHING ABNORMAL ABOUT HIM,HE TOLD ME THAT HE LOVES ME AND HE KEPT ON KISSING ME OVER AND OVER AGAIN,HE POLISED HIS SHOES AND I TOOK HIM HALFWAY!HE WAS SO HAPPY,WHY I DONT KNOW AND I WAS SO SHOCKED.IS HE CHEATING!DO I DESERVE THIS,IRELLY LOVE HIM AND HAVE SHOWN HIM IN DIFFERENT WAYS AND HE KNOWS THAT EVENTHOUGH HE DONT TRUST ME.WHAT SHOULD I DO TO BE HAPPY AGAIN WITH HIM.
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I am not going to spend my night, reading this essay.