My boyfriend might be sorta gay and cheating on me.. I don’t know. Help.?
My boyfriend gave me his password to check his bank statement. I thought "I wonder if this password is the same for his email." So I put it in and yes.. I looked through his email out of curiosity, I’m very insecure and I wanted to see if he wasn’t doing anything I wouldn’t like.. I know I shouldn’t have and it was a silly thing to do but I came across some emails of him messaging guys saying he wants to suck their dicks because he’s never done it before and would like to try it. So he’s gonna try to get together with these "guys".
I.. don’t know what to say or even think. I love my boyfriend dearly and I know he loves me. We’ve known each other for a very long time but right now I’m extremely hurt and don’t know what to do. He is probably the best thing that ever happened to me, he treats me well and we have so much fun together (and I know he’s not GAY we have really awesome sex, and he loves it.. maybe he’s a little bi curious I dunno). But right now I’m a little past the fact that he wants to do that sort of thing. What hurts me is that he’s pretty much going to cheat on me. Now I don’t know what to do.. should I tell him I went into his personal email and looked at all of that. Or keep it to myself.
I don’t know what to do.
See, I’m afraid he’s going to get mad that I went into his email like a crazed jealous girlfriend though.
I don’t think he’s gay, I do think he is bi-curious. I know the guy. He fucking loves tits. Especially asian girls.. I don’t think he wants to have sex with a guy, just suck a guys dick because he’s curious.
I’m a pretty accepting person. I do love him. I just don’t want him to cheat on me, that’s what really makes me sad. I’ve never had to deal with something like this before, I don’t know what to do..
Also, I didn’t mean to be a bitch.. just.. it tempted me and I know he cheated on his last girlfriend with me. Those thoughts kept running through my head it made me worried he would to the same with me. I’m only human.. I know that’s not exactly an excuse but i love him so much, I just get scared of being hurt again.
Okay… I think what I’m gonna do is just wait it out. He hasn’t done anything yet that I know of.. and if I continue to see something weird I will say something. I love him and I know I’m insecure but I want to work on that. I’m going to try my best to deal with it for now.
@James: I agree. You’re right. Thank you. Well except, like I said before, him being curious isn’t what bothers me now.. it was a little odd at first, but I quickly got over that fact and saw that what really truly scared me was that he would cheat on me with someone else.
This relationship is very important to me though, and I’m glad I posted this on this site so I could get my head straight.. I know I have things I need to work on to make it better. We are very happy together and I miss him every day I don’t see him. He lives two hours away but were making it work. I’ve known him for five years, and have no been dating him again for six months (we broke up a while back in high school, but got back together after five years of being just friends) and he is the best boyfriend any girl could ask for and I try my best to show him that each day.
His privacy is his privacy, I’m not going to go into his email anymore.
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The reason he gave you his password, was because he trusted you, but he was
wrong wasn’t he?
You of course will not stop there now, because now you are curious & it will destroy
what you have.
You will eventually realize that most men & women are either BI curious or BI at some time
in their lives. If you in your wisdom think this is too much for you, the relationship is
doomed.
It never used to be easy to meet or talk about sexual matters, but now with the internet,
it is so easy. At one time thousands, millions of people would suppress any curiosity
& go through life like that, but it is easy now. It is learning.
You have choices.
1, You can stop being curious & prove that you are better than anyone else
for him.
2, You will always be curious & troubled by what you have read & your relationship
will not work.
"Curiosity killed the cat"
um yeah, i don’t think there’s such a thing as a "little gay" you should probably ask him about it. I think you have the right to find out if there’s a chance he could possible give you AIDS in the near future.
dress as a man and suck his ***k …. might that work??? goodlick…
it could be a joke with his friends because me and my friends act gay all the time but we never do any of the things..god no… but its just funny screwin around with your friends and say stuff you dont mean
Get a straight boyfriend, maybe he won’t be so curious.
if your into doubles go for it
or just go for it anyway
My dear, with AIDS and a host of other STD’s to worry about, preserving his ego is one of the least of your problems. You have got to protect yourself, physically and emotionally.
Confess what you did, apologize for invading his privacy and try and get the truth out of his as to what he has in fact done thus far.
You’re really going to have to talk about it with him. That will be the fastest and most accurate way of getting answers.
Answer Mine? Not getting many answers : (
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100206000816AAQd2Ug
Well, first off, going into someones Email without their permission is not only illegal, but makes you a total bit**.
Other than that, I say don’t sweat it, he wants to try something new. Now maybe I’m being bias because I enjoy Open Relationships, but why worry? He just wants to try a homoerotic activity with one guy. Once. If he starts going back for more then maybe you should start questioning, but I don’t see this any-worse than him and a buddy jerking off together, or watching a porn. He’s not out having vaginal intercourse with your sister.
As long as he’s protected. He shouldn’t let a guy cum in his mouth, and he should probably make the guy wear a condom anyway. You can get HIV and Gonorrhea from Precum.
-Why don’t you try asking about bringing another guy into the bedroom? (I mean, in all reality, Threesoms can totally rock your world, and your a girl, so one with two guys should REALLY, ROCK your world.)
However if that idea sickens you and your totally appalled by anything except monogamy, then just tell him you were going through your internet cookies, and discovered he was talking about S’ing someones D. Then you can confront him about.
Who knows, maybe he’s not gay. Maybe he’s just a psycho-killer who hunts down gay men by pretending to want to suck them off.
That would make you feel better huh?
If you don’t tell him what you did and what you found out, then you are just as much to blame for your lame relationship as he is. When you made the decision to invade his personal email you made the decision to find out things he didn’t want you to know. That said, he is contemplating cheating and you know that, so why not tell him, what do have to lose. You 2 don’t have a very strong relationship and you are obviously not ready to be in a stable relationship with your issues of insecurity. You will out grow those issues as you mature and find out who you are and own it, til then, you have a lot of life to experience.
I wouldn’t tell him you looked through his emails unless you have no choice. I think that you should let him experiment with his sexuality and in the future if you have a feeling that he is continuing with other guys then check his emails again and see if you are right. If so, you shouldn’t have to stand for that.
That’s an extremely hard place to be, if you confront him and somehow (i don’t know how) it turns out to be something else probably won’t end up good. He will feel violated and that he cannot trust you. But on the same coin, if you ignore it, you’ll only be hurting yourself, and that will only lead to fights.
Also something to think about, when you go looking for something you will probably find something.
It seems you should be ready to face the music and tell him that you used his password to read his e-mails. If the 2 of you have a strong relationship, even though he may get angry and be hurt by this apparent betrayal of trust, by talking with each other, you should both be able to work through this. Another thought is maybe, just maybe, he knew you would be nosy and look at his e-mails. those e-mails could have been put there just for you to read. not saying thats the case, just that it is a possibility. So talk to him. The only way to decide what to do with the information you have is to talk to him and work this through.
Straight men do not email other straight men in discussion of sucking each others penis. Don’t believe it? Care for the code to my in-box? You don’t cite ages, but given the background you present, he’s well past the age of “just curious”. Neither of you can be trusted, so perhaps you deserve each other. Plan time to discuss the matter fully and openly, then make a joint decision as to how much you love each other.