Why must people cheat???
How many times can you forgive your spouse for cheating? 1, 2, even 3 times! I am at the end of my rope not only did she cheat again but this time she brought something home to our bed and now I have to pay the price for her selfishness, "Thank God it is curable". Where do you draw the line if you truly love someone? 14 years together 12 married and I know of 2 times for sure and suspect at least 2 others. what would you do?
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Tagged with: god • love • People • rope • Selfishness
Filed under: Infidelity Warning Signs
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i would leave.
but, there is no easy or clear cut answer for you in this situation, because in all honesty it seems as though you are resigned to stay with the marriage. every marriage is a system of ‘exchanges’…she is putting in garbage (cheating) and getting out roses (your love and commitment)…why would she change her ways at the current rate of exchange?
you need to realize that love is about respect and you are not getting that and move on-or-decide that you love her unconditionally and are willing to take the good with the bad…over and over again…..and in that case…I hope she never brings something worse home to you.
Women cheat because you aren’t satisfying them and also because they have absolutely no morals nor have respect for their bodies and cannot commit to anything!
Leave her asap.
I’d cut it (the relationship) off. I’d forgive once maybe even twice but 3 strikes and she’s out.
leave…you don’t deserve that…
If she really loved/cared about you, she wouldn’t sleep with other men. Also, she wouldn’t be bringing home diseases that could potentially infect you….
As horrible as it’s gonna sound, I think it’s time for divorce. It happens to the best of people, like you. There is absolutely NO excuse for cheating. Cheating 3 times AND bringing home a disease? Wow. Just wow. 14 years of marriage and this is how she repays you for your loyalty? You can try a counselor….but she will most likely not stop cheating. Divorce
I’m so sorry about your situation…
i honestly dont like this solution but, if you dont go to a couselor, then you should get devorced.
its not right for her to be like that.
when my parents got devorced i was devistated, but at least you can do it for the right reason
try marriage counseling. if nothing else, file for divorce. but if i was in your shoes, i woulve gotten rid of her the very first time. you shouldve known it was going to happen again.
if she keeps cheating, tell her it’s not working out…it’s not worth it to love someone who won’t love you back…i would’ve dump her and divorce her…tell her that you’ve given her chances, and she’s not taking them seriously. if she cheats on you, then it’s obvious she’s not in love with you anymore…find someone else who will treat you the same way you treat them.
OK so you are considering spending the rest of your life like this, right? Is that how you want to live, because obviously it is not going to change. If this is your idea of a good life, stick with him. Good luck.
a heart can only take so much I been there and still going but the feelings arn the same for me it hurts less now cause I know I cant trust him and its not fair look if you need to talk my e-mail is noitsnotyoursitsmine@yahoo.com
don’t keep doing this to yourself. you know the answer.
line was drawn the first time.. there are to many people out there to be wasting time with some one who is going to hurt you and cheat on u.. there’s no reason for it.. life’s to short.. i would draw the line NOW…. its not fair to you.. u want to be loved the way you love somebody.. and they aren’t giving that to you… I’m really sorry your having to go threw this.. i wish you the best of luck.. there’s no forgiving for that many time counseling isn’t going to help more than once it should be over.. you don’t need to be sad and lonely… go meet some one else live Ur life and be happy!!!
Tell her unless she cuts the bullshit and starts being honest, you’re out the door. I’m so sorry, I’ve been cheated on and it hurts, I know. Once is forgiveable, after that it becomes an issue that needs to be talked over and solved, if not, then its the end of a happy marriage.
damn shame .. well if u do know of it they why not confront her about it… if u dont then she would jst think she could get away with it everytime and keep on doing it.. well that is if u love her and still wants her around another solution is u can replace her… and that would be my solution.. but goodluck
Go to marriage counseling and if that does work, she is just going to keep cheating…. I would have drawn the line after the 2nd time
Poeple cheat because they are tired of perfection tried of being nice and tired of being on the same schedule.
It is time to move on my friend.
By you forgiving her even one time you gave her permission to cheat.
I told him up front… you cheat once.. you are history. For some reason I fall out of love with a person as soon as they put it somewhere else and the feeling never comes back.
I would of left her the first time. Because look where you are now……she cheated again….Forgiving is BS..
get out of there now! what if had been incurable?! if she has alraeady cheated that many times, she isnt going to stop! stop being her doormat!
Cut your losses and get out…you can’t do anything about the 14 years that you have lost being married to someone that cheats on you but you can do something about the rest of your life…leave, go buy a snake (or a puppy I guess), and enjoy the rest of your life.
i think this is very personal. in my opinion, i would forgive once. anyone may have a moment of weakness, but if she does it more than one time she does not even respect you. i simply would not forgive the second time. but this may be just me.
She obviously doesn’t value the marriage. I’ve never thought that after one mistake a person should just throw in the towel and I would never advise someone to do something that they don’t want to but…..wouldn’t you like to be in a committed relationship? One that you could count on? I know it is a difficult situation…I really do..and you have so much time invested but she seems rather unfeeling from the small amount of information I have. Would either of you be willing to go to counseling? Is this something that has been brushed under the table and not confronted? I can’t imagine my spouse not thinking enough of me and my health.
welll im only 15 but from my experience if she has cheated on you that many times shes most likely not going to stop. i went out with my last bf for 6 months and he cheated twice….im glad i moved thow cause i know he would of cheated again.
theres someone out there much better than that.
well thats what i learned anyway .
Why do people cheat: 1. they are in highschool 2. they are selfish 3. they learned it in highschool and never grew up 4. long distance relationship 5. they are selfish 6. They don’t have boundaries and don’t know how to say no 7. they were molested or raped at a young age 8. they have no self respect 9. they are drug addicts 10. an alcholic 11. addicted to porn and number 12. they have no respect for their family. Gee you should have learned by number two why did you stick around for number 3. You have proof so leave or suck it up and accept that your wife is a cheater but then with 1 in 3 adults having an std why play with a loaded gun. Let her go and find yourself a honest women but first firgue out why you put up with it, because LOVE is faithful.
because they cannot control themselves
ah i agree cheating is very bad…but if the marriage is not a happy one for her..? i assume you had tried to work it out..let her go and find your own happiness..coz love is a Gift..and i ask nothing in Return..i live by that rule..but it still Hurts i know.
I would have left after the first time. Once a cheater always a cheater.
I would have been gone after the first time!
Wow she even gave you an STD…..you should’ve left her the second time around man, she does NOT love you….what in the world man. Love is mutual not one-sided, so granted you love her but she OBVIOUSLY doesn’t love you man, you need to find someone who will mutually love you….because all it is now is an obsession, and we all know that’s not healthy at all….foul…girl is straight foul.
I wish I can give a better answer then this..but I feel they cheat because they are selfish and want a taste of grass from both sides!I’m sorry you’re going through this!Maybe someday the good won’t finish last!!!Anyone can say they’d leave until they are going through it them self!!Add kids to it and its even harder!Hope you do what best for you!
time to leave…