what to do if you find your spouse cheating after reading thier email?
Tagged with: email • Spouse Cheating
Filed under: Infidelity Warning Signs
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So many times letters are misunderstood. So be careful with your conclusions. The best is a straight talk with her about your suspicions or fears. She will answer you something that you have to think over carefully. Horribile dictu, even you might be the reason of her relationship, or that "cheating" is not a serious one, you may step forward easily.
You tell them about it and you divorce them. Sorry too hear that man. Don’t give in it that is the ultimate act of betrayal.
Only you can answer that by doing some serious soul-searching. If you think, after many issues are worked out, that you can trust them again and truly love them again, then you can consider an attempt at reconciliation. If you can’t trust/love the same again, I would seriously look at leaving.
there is no trust in your relationship
your spouse is cheating and your spying in their private email.
move on find someone else
homicide
well you were wrong for snooping but clearly you were looking for a reason. if you want to ignore it, fine do as you wish, but your spouse needs to be confronted. cheating is NEVER okay.
Go to the local Home Depot,buy a shovel,some rope and fertilizer.Kill them and bury them under the front porch.
I would say you are a snoop you don’t read your spouses’ email.
If you are not that trusting you have issues, you might have pushed that spouse to someone else for solace.
Try marriage counseling your lines of communication aren’t open. You don’t bail out of a marriage for every error committed both of you need to talk . You took vows "for better or worse" that shows a true committment to the vows.
tell them you read their emails and you wouldn’t of had to if they weren’t cheating
You leave them.
It would depend on the circumstances. Is it just an online fantasy or is she meeting the guy? Did you do anything to cause her to want to cheat? If you think it’s real serious, I’d copy the emails and go see a lawyer.
To cheat upon by your spouse is a sin. However, it is better to ignore than to pin point this cheating. It will add to your worries and it is also possible to make your spouse to Track the right path . Good Luck
first of all, print the email and make sure you keep a copy…second take a copy of it, drop it in front of the offender and ask for an explanation…I, personally would never forgive a cheater. I think it is a character flaw that makes a person have those tendencies in the first place and they are bound to do it again.
Good luck…bad situation, I hope it works out ok for you.
Confront them.
Let them know that, while you made a mistake by invading their privacy/reading their e-mail, it was obviously not an unwarranted move. You probably should not have been snooping in their e-mail in the first place, but it turns out that you found something that they REALLY should not have been doing.
I had the exact same scenario happen to me!!
Sorry to heard that. Tell her that you know, see whats the reaction, ask why she is doing it maybe is just a fantasy but it still wrong. If she don’t care then divorce her but if she is really sorry and apologize then think about it, because a divorce is ugly and sad. If you give her a second chance then install a spy software in the computer and if you see it doing it again then the person wasn’t really sorry in the beginning.
Don’t listen to the people in here saying to kill her or that is wrong to read her emails. You are the spouse and both suppose to be one, without secret and only trust it is not wrong to read her emails or Viceversa. it is wrong if you are reading a co-worker email. Those people saying that might be cheating as well. I can talk because I had the same problem before and now in my present relation we don’t have a problem of leaving our emails open and if I see her reading it I care less. Courts now days don’t care about cheating especially California. But just in case print the evidence.
Hopefully everything goes better. Take care and think before act.
Good Luck
difficult one that, because for you to admit that you know they are cheating, you have to admit to snooping through their private emails !
Looks like you are both wasting each other’s time. I would call it a day and move onto to someone who doesn’t cheat on you and one that you don’t feel the need to pry into their personal emails
Best of luck
Let them know that u know and take it from there. Leave them.
First make sure that u are absolutely certain that they are cheating and that you arent reading too far into something thats not there. EX; if she gets emails from another man that doesnt automatically mean that she is cheating, unless the email specifically says something to that effect. And even if the email from a man says something sexual is it mutual? Maybe this guy is harassing her.
If you are without a doubt sure that something is going on then confront her about it. I think all privacy matters go out the window when you catch them cheating. Poking through someones emails kinda takes a back seat when you catch them cheating.
Do you still wanna be with your spouse knowing that you have been betrayed???
First of all why are you reading her email? I’m sure she doesn’t read yours.
If she is cheating there must be something you aren’t doing in the marriage.
Don’t accuse her of cheating until you have all the facts. She may be planning a business meeting for all you know.
Good way: Print it all and bring to a lawyer – then (out of the blue) drop divorce papers on the person…(assuming you are done…)
or
If you want to repair the relationship – print the e-mails and confront them and tell them it’s either counseling or it’s over…
Evil way: Print out two copies of the e-mails. Take one to your lawyer. Take the second set to their place of business, confront them and then burn the e-mails and chuck ‘em on their desk.
I’m not saying the evil way is the right way, but sometimes a passing evil thought helps you make it through the business of getting the ‘good’ one done…
See if you can join in!
PRINT IT ALL OUT!
Why should emails be "private" between spouses?
That is complete BS!
I don’t think you did anything wrong.
Listen to your gut.
You will need the emails for the divorce.
Infidelity is unacceptable & a deal breaker.
I would also print a second copy.
Package it nicely & make them think that it is a gift.
Then let them open it!
Don’t question things, you have it in writing in front of your face.
If a person can lie to you & cheat they will lie to you to save face.
I found out about my husband’s cheating after coming across it on his email!! I confronted him about it and he denied it for 2 days!! By then I had gone into OVERDRIVE and found a lot of proof.
We are trying to make it work now but some days are still very hard to get through.BETRAYAL IS REALLY HARD TO DEAL WITH!!
I would highly recommend the follwing site for advice and support
http://www.survivinginfidelity.com
tapestry must me a cheater too. You must have reasons to check the email. She is a classic example of someone who is not trustworthy and finds excuses for immoral behavior and betraying actions. She is betraying you bro! So a little bit of a checkup on your part…nothing wrong with it! Cheaters always have excuses for their choices too just like tapestry said…its your fualt that she is doing this..whatever no it AINT!
I have been there done that…i checked my wifes emails because after 12 years you know when somethign is different…you can feel it…even when you make love you know…and the mroe time she spent o that pc and minimized windows when I would walk in…
So I had my reasons to check…installed monitoring software and holy Sh&t!
You deserved to know bro…you have reasons to do this…otherwise she would have stayed cheating and cheating on you…what if she brings home a desease? Dont listen to tapestry…
Anyway my ex wife is on guy # 18 now in 18 months…she left me and the kids…barely even sees them. She was selfish…jsut like your wife is
bring it up to her bro…you will definately get a guilty reaction…and she will try to make you feel guilty for snooping or for doing what she did…dont buy it…it was HER choice!
If she is remorseful you guys can work it out but if not then dude you are in for a long roller coaster ride just like me when even though my wife was not remorseful i still tried…to no avail and it dug me into a deeper emotional hole. read her reactions and her intentions…if she is not truly remorseful its time to file sicne no amount of work will change her.
I cant believe tapestry’s answer or anyone else who said it was wrong to check…what about ehr commitment to her vows? Its not your fualt bro dont listen to these ppl! Cheaters always point fingers elsewhere!