When does it stop hurting so much?

Its been 15 months since he left and its as fresh today as it was then. Its easy for him because come to find out he was cheating and now lives with her and her 3 kids. After 16 yrs I’m still in shock and thought that if marriage is bad or problems you both would know it. I don’t get it because she is still married herself and has not filed for divorce dut we have and is almost completed. Odd thing is if your spouse is going to do the most selfish act one can do why would they down grade, I mean she is truly foul. Even so I miss him and am so sad and hurt and just can’t shake it. How do you heal, what does it take?

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