what would you do if your husband wanted to…?

My husband has been hanging out w/ friend from work, they’re both IT guys, his friend recently began dating a girl from work that he, my husband and she and her friend went together to a couple MLB games, not like a double date, but the joke is made. These four have become somewhat friends i guess, only been 2 games though.

So, the girlfriend has a cabin in MI. I am guessing spouses are invited because he told me one of the guys who’s going will prob have to talk his wife into going (ha ha). Greg doesn’t want me there. It’s just his friend, the girlfriend, the girl, and a couple other guys from work he says. The weekend away is next weekend. I became very upset at this, asking why am i not invited if spouses are invited, and further, why doesn’t he want me to go with?

Since having 3rd kid he’s been telling me about some other girl at his office who is maried and has kids and was telling him about her breastfeeding trials and tribulations (mind you, he’s a boob man. he told me about this, it was months ago when i was also b-feeding, so there was a commonality to it, but weird, i’d never talk to a guy about my breastfeeding and how it was coming along, unless i wanted that guy to picture my breasts…) Anyway, not that it’s hard to get a guy to picture breasts, right? har.

SO, he doesn’t get why i’m so aggravated about the weekend thing, he says he doesn’t want to go now, it’s going to be too much trouble for our relationship. His not asking me has created a much much deeper chasm of insecurity in me about this ‘friend’ at his work.

Today we have a family bd party, it’s my 4yo nephew, it’s 45 mins away, it’s only at McDonalds playland w/ our 3 kids, no biggie, but he decided this mornign he needs to go to the junk yard and it’s going to take all day…

Even though i’ve been open w/ my communication to him about how insecure this friendship is making me, and even though he legitimately needs to go to the junkyard (he buys and sells used cars as a hobby), and even though he’s never missed a family get together, now, after all these months of hanging out w/ his work friends together, and now after this fight over not going for the weekend, and now he’s cancelling all future baseball games too (to make me feel ridiculous and like a real shrew who won’t let her man go out ANYWHERE! is his tone), and i just want to know:

Am i nuts? Is he cheating? Does he want to cheat? Of course he does, he’s a man, but wtf?? Really??? Even if this is all made up in my head, how can he be so insensitive about it? SAHM w/o a life, gave it all up to be home w/ kids, and now i’m here and he’s being asked out all the time and resenting me and kids bec of it, and we’re 42 yrs old, it’s not like we didn’t have 35 yrs of fun partying…

Help. Am afraid i’m driving an imaginary issue into a wedge issue, or is it real, or am i nuts? ????

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