why do i keep thinking about my girlfriend cheating on me, i dont know what is wrong with me

Hi ihad a very strong 4 year relationship which was long distance on and off. I recently broke up with my girlfriend finding out that she was cheating on me wid a guy whom i had warned her about. Now i was so badly torn apart that i didnt know what to do. I really oved this girl with my heart and soul. Recently i have noticed dat when i want to have a "good time"(masturbate) i see her in front of my eyes and see shes all excited and getting pleasure but suddenly as i am about to have an orgasm i notice shes been having sex with that guy she cheated upon me and then i feel guilty after masturbatin that y am i thinking of her and why am i seeing her having sex wid d other guy. more so i also asked her the most private questions regarding her sexual relations with the other guy as to how they did it when and what all they used to do. I dont know its wrong from my side to ask those questions maybe but i just cant move on and get the bottomline as to how she got sexually involved with some1 else while she was being physical wid me also at the same point of time, I kinda asked her was he better dan me and how was he in sex, i dont know my sexual, emotional and mental ego has been hurt with the fact that she was cheating on me and having sex so it kinda makes me guilty dat what was so sexually arousing or appealing for hr and what made her go to the other guy. I mean everything was going fine in our relationship apart from the off and off meeting coz we used to meet after every 6 months or so for a few days but thats should not be an excuse coz if dat was d case then i would have also strayed with other girls if i had the opportunity but i was dead fixed on her and knew my limits and besides we have stayed initially in this relationship for 6 months in the same city to get that understanding… I know its not fair on my part on asking these questions but i did ask her and she did answer those questions on my insistence and somehow i feel end of the day, i feel like very low emotionally but at the same time i am feeling lighter by getting those things out of her mind and my mind by listening to all the details she told me about her affair with that guy no matter how hurting they were but i do feel its out of the system although the mental images and her words which she told me keeps coming back into my mind but it has eased my pain to some extent i dont know how and why this has happened, although i did ask her all the possible private questions, i dont know whether i should have asked her or not asked her, moreover she is regretting her cheating on me and wants to come back to me at any cost and she has realised that she missed out on a gem of a guy as we were suppose to get married in a years time or so. Shes finished her relations with that guy having known the true nature of the relationship and the intentions of that guy. I am caught up in a big muddle and i dont know how to get out of it…

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