Sorry long but brother wants to know. What is SIL saying here?

She said:
I have done a lot of thinking during this past week. It was good to see you too because the last time I did you were with that woman and I wasn’t sure I would be able to stomach the sight of you again. I was pleasantly surprised that I was and remain firm that I don’t want the complications and expenses of divorce, annulment, or legal separation. It is also clear to me that I am wasting my life just sitting here waiting for you and I am not willing to do that long term.

I consulted an attorney about it and he said the law does not expect anyone to sit patiently on a shelf after their spouse has left the marital home and sent a letter stating they are not coming back with their wedding band enclosed. He said I don’t need to risk the complications of divorce, annulment or legal separation to move on and he doesn’t suggest that I risk them because you said you’d never take anything from me but you also said that you would never cheat on me then told me you have been having sex with that woman during our separation. He said your actions and that letter constitute provocation and that is a defense if you try to divorce me for going on with my life instead of sitting here in limbo while you continue living as husband and wife with that woman, as you said you are. He also said that if next year we are still separated, I can file taxes as head of household without a legal separation because you haven’t been living here and you pay expenses at your house while I pay mortgage and everything else here.So he said the only reason I would have to divorce you is if I want to get married to somebody else. That isn’t the case so dissolution of the marriage is not what’s at stake here. What’s at stake here is whether you want to try to save our marriage or I move on the same as you have.

I am willing to recommit to the marriage if you are. What that would mean to me is we agree on a date within the next 3 months when you are going to come home by. Then and only then, you schedule an appointment for counseling.We will go there to come up with a strategy for you to end things with that woman so that you can be home by the date set and help you deal with the opposition we are no doubt going to encounter. While you are working on how to get back home, I want you to get tested for HIV and STD’s and I want to see the results in writing. You’ve been with that woman for 8 months and anything would show on the bloodwork after 6-so if you’ve picked up anything, it will show by now and testing is free at the health dept. If you are unwilling or unable to do these things, then I’ll know suggesting counseling was merely a stalling tactic to keep me on a shelf while you continued doing what you have the last 8 months and that’s no longer an option.

What is SIL saying here?

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