about spouse cheating and requested paperless bill & hiding cell?
called up de girls # hanged up on me, spouse telling me shes filing restraining order for harrassment against me/him for calling her, its realy been tense at home but still living together saying I have no right callin #s on his cell, have kids together don’t know what to do with him cos hes still denying her that shes just a customer but un his bill they talk everyday, text & voice messages which I listened to. but hes still claiming has nothing to do with her, b4 I got to this point did alot of research on her & very confident they have something going on but all the signs of cheating he does not display except for his cell/bill every other thing never changed, but is it possible to be dating a woman & not spend quality time with her, he asked me this question, maybe they always have a quickie or something, pls advise
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WOW…. This sucks becasue you have kids but my thing is if nothing is going on then why is he being so secretive about it and on top of that why is she being a witch about the fact that you called to find out! If she was a real woman she would have talked and had nothing to hide but they both do so that is why they are so witchy about this I think. My ex was the same way couldnt use his cell all these text messages and late night calls and not to me! I say tell him its you and the kids or remind him that CHEATING gives you the kids, house, car, and whatever else the court system hates cheating!!
she could be a friend/confidant that he talks with and nothing sexual at all…if the two of you are having problems…there are a few guys out there who actually have female friends they don’t screw…maybe he confides in her and asks her opinion from a females prospective…i would suggest counseling until you find out otherwise…
Most times when you believe your mate is having an affair, you are right. Counter sue Alienation of Affections
Even if they aren’t having an affair it apears he has strayed close enough to the fence you know he is going to cross it one day. You know the nature of thier communications, might be time to hire a private detective, if they are cheating they generally are caught in less than a week. oprah had a show on cheating, there is a behavior profile that cheaters go thru. What I remember is 1 very happy, 2 gifts for no reason.3 depression 4 suspects you are cheating - 2 more points i don’t remember
What do the messages say, maybe she is only a customer. Or is he calling her and obsessing over her or are you? Your in a very difficult situation. Try to trust your husband. Counseling, for both of you to try to make the marriage work. If you feel that you can’t do that then leave him, relationship is only going to get worse. Besides that there is nothing much you can do.
well never known anyone that not only needed to call a customer every day but text as well on a regular bases.. sounds very fishy, but id be doing some undercover work.. like showing up at his job unexpectantly not necessarially with his knowledge, but more so from a far watch where he goes at lunch.. etc.. but at some point when u cant come up with substantial proof u need to stop torturing urself and realize that not all men cheat.. even if something looks fishy, but by all means check to make sure before u look blindly at it.. but when everything turns up to be on the up and up (if it does) then let it go.. but id be sitting acrossed the street from his job seeing where he goes for lunch or after work, even if i had to ask a friend to lend me her car or drive me so he didnt notice it was me.. but if theres nothing then u have to have faith sometime.. if he’s going to cheat theres nothing u can do about it, he’ll cheat if he wants to.. u cant stop it from happening.. so dont be blind, but dont keep searching for something if its not there..
My husband almost left me over his friendship with a woman at work recently. We have 3 kids too. I didn’t know anything was going on until he told me he was leaving. I gave him the option of staying and he has stayed. He was texting and phoning this "friend" every day.
He assures me that it is over and leaves his cell phone where i can see it. He found it difficult telling me about her and there is still lots i don’t know.
I think you have to make your spouse choose who he wants. He can’t have both of you. When he is spending time on her its time that he should be spending on you and your kids. Apparently these friendships are quite common among married men. There are always excuses as to why they have became close to another woman so find out what his are and work on them if you want him to stay. My husband felt as if i didn’t want him anymore???? He even thought that i didn’t like sex with him even though he made me come every time we did it. I am making my husband feel really special by having loads of sex with him, leaving him notes in his lunchbox, asking him about his day, being at the door to greet him home etc etc. He is taking me out once a week for a meal or a drink.
You both have to decide if you want to make your relationship work or not. If he decides to stay with you at 1st you will be so glad that he has stayed that you will do anything for him! I haven’t reached the next stage yet…
Hope everything works out for you
You can still cheat and not have sex. Either way he is in a close relationship with another woman and it is not appropriate as you are his wife. It all starts in the mind, then through phone calls, text messages, etc. . . They may not be having sex but their relationship is wrong and you have every right to question it.
OH MY GOSH,,,,,,,,,hang in there girlie,,,,,,,,if it smells like skunk, looks like skunk, and CHATS like skunk !!!!! Sounds like skunk to me ,,,,,,,,,RESTRAINING ORDER,,,,ha,,,,,if so facto,,,,,,,,,,,,,then he will be home more and comunications will stop in order to keep in good standing with the "customer" . Ask him which should worry him more, her RESTRAINING ORDER or your DIVORCE PAPERS . He seems to be acting like a sneak . Were the voice messages overly sweet and friendly ? And yeah CHEATING is Dating,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,QUALITY TIME is Adultry !!!!! Why wouldn’t he be willing to transfer this account to someone else in the company in order to stay in good standing for his company and to keep peace under his roof ? Stay cool and let it simmer a bit .
time to read the lines it nothing u say u think u better smell the roses if it being beauitful u might want to shine be that lady it time a man think but ya the lady u think u can will whip it it time but it can never be fullfilling commucation is a line a smile a moment it it awaste of time love is what he seek u better think u
Where there is smoke there is usually a fire. Could be an emotional affair, talk at this point, maybe nothing physical has happened its all been verbal. don’t give away all your amunition, (source of info) if you are checking cell phone bill why tell at this point, continue to inspect what you expect ,gather your information. Good luck
You already answered you own questions. He is cheating. Guys can lie and look you straight in the face . Get out get a detective and proof it . Once a cheater always a cheater. They say they change , but all they do is get better at it.
Protect yourself and your children. There is no need to talk with someone and text message every day and several times a day.
You just don’t want to admit he is a cheat . Get smart don’t get run over by this guy.
One word……………. LEAVE
He is a liar dont waist your time and energy on a loser that doesnt love you. Good luck…… and YES you have that right to look and call….Screw him
So what if he talks to or texts her. And what does that prove? Nothing except he has a friend that he enjoys talking to. Get yourself a friend to talk to and or text. Is it practical to believe to be the only woman he’ll ever talk to in life????? You can not be that exciting. (no disrespect intended) Just something for you to think about. And stop looking for things that you can not handle. Believe me…when it’s your time to know …you’ll know. why put yourself through all that garbage. And chances are you aren’t ready to leave him anyway so leave his stuff alone. And get you some stuff of your own.
dump the bastard file for child support then take all the money and he will get behind on his bill and you dont have to worry about it anymore
weird but knowing that girls are jealous over a girl friend that their boyfriend has they are probaly just infactuated w/ eachother but nuthin else.
If you have the cash, hire a good PI. Sense there are children involved I would not let on I even distrusted him. Keep it cool, he will let his guard down. Catch him in the act & get solid proof, then nail his ass to the wall in divorce court. When all else fells, follow your gut instinct.
hiii i think that the time has come now for you to think long hard about where you life is going and do you realy needs all thease problems in your life,if you losing you trust for him hes not doing anything to earn it anymore the think is this what you into with him now really worth putting up with because just as he can change the things he says does so can you, allso you have you own life as well and you have your own power to make changes if he wont but if you do then change things only for you let him see if he can change then so can you .
Ok let me say that i am sorry you are having doubts.Question is, if he is telling you one thing what reason do you have not to trust him? has he cheated before?(yes, there are always signs)Maybe His"issue" about the secrecy with the phone and the bil,etc is more about privacy…respecting his space.Trusting him enough to take his word. Now, if your gut intuition is telling you different, the follow up on it. Maybe snooping isnt the best way, just flat out aske her. But chances are if he isnt showing any other signs of cheating, then he isnt. Men feel insecure when it comes to "privacy"(meaning space) After all he is no longer a single man every aspect of his life is shared with you, maybe he just wants to feel like this is his?!?
You know the answer…he’s cheating. How can you expect him to respect you if you don’t respect yourself enough to trust you feelings. Why would he talk to another woman everyday? There are no specific signs of cheating, but he displaying them now. As for the restraining order/telephone harrassment…If she asked you not to call and you continue to, you can be charged with harassment. You can’t have a solid relationship without trust and you don’t have it. Justified or not, it will never work without it.
if you think he is cheating he is. and yes men get quickies hos dont care that the man is married
If you do not trust your husband then you have a serious problem.Trust is everything without it you have nothing.Don’t stay with him just because you have kid’s that is the worst mistake that parents make the child is the one that ultimately pay’s the price.Talk to your husband if you don’t trust him then you don’t belong with him.Good luck.
Bottom line, people hide what they are ashamed of or what they know others will not approve of. If it’s innocent then he should have no problem with you knowing all about it. My husband has female friends and I have male friends and we hide nothing. We can talk to them right in front of each other and we often take each other’s phone by accident and it’s no big deal. If she’s hanging up like that and being that way, she’s probably trying to avoid all contact with the lady she’s doing wrong by disrespecting her home and he’s even more wrong than her because you are his WIFE. Sounds like it’s a good time to start getting things in order for you and your little ones….smells like trouble. Good Luck Sweetie
CALL THE PHONE COMANY REQEST A COPY OF THE BILLS
First of all, it’s possible to be dating and not spending time with a person, and it’s also a fact for them to be doing more than that. Don’t let him turn you into a gullible person because your not if you were you wouldn’t have sent this 4 others to view. And you should act like you don’t care, and if it continues get a divorce. You don’t have to put yourself threw this.Worrying bring alot of things. Who knows they could have been doing this 4 awhile, now their both in love with each other in he’s in a triangle. That you have the choice to get out
im an introvert type of person but sounds to me ur situation is much difficult than my case.i would talk it over then if it doesn’t going well..i’d prepare myself for whatever is going to happen..do u believe in god?..have faith…goodluck!
he is just telling you that she is filing a restraining order so you will not call her again. As his wife, you have a right to look at anything that you want to!! I have been a victim of a husband with a shady phone bill too. He might only be talking and flirting now but believe me that curiosity will set in and he will see her eventually.
He is just lying. My boyfriend at the time did the same thing went to paperless billing and was always hiding his phone and turning it off when he was around me. Come to see that I saw how he was behaving and checked his records and found a number that was coming up a lot and yup when I called the girl had no idea that I existed…
Sounds very suspicious, and guys don’t have women as friends without thinking having sex with them. As far as quickies, I know someone that has sex with a delivery guy in his truck almost every day at work. She says she’s going out for a smoke, meets him in the alley, they have quick sex and she comes back in about 15 minutes. Her boyfriend has no idea and she’ll even have sex with him that night.
if it look like a duck and quack like a duck then it a ** duck dont be no fool leave him and let him pay you through the courts and let them be together and you can take her money to let him go there are to many diseases out there for him to fooling around on you leave him alone
I learned that no one is special in this world, but you have to play it fair in order for it to play fair with you. Everyone has to do the same thing and not mess up the circle. It really hurts to get cheated on or even to be able to cheat on others, because I feel like no one deserves that and be treated with all the respect possible. Other hand, hiding cell and paper bill is also unnecessarily. You have to learn to let each other know whats going on and update with all the bills so they can handle everything in the right proper way. Remember peoples, if you cheat, you have to learn that it can come back and haunt you. So stay fair and be fair to life.
Well. This is doubtful case. You call your b/f and call clarification on the points which arise in your mind. If he satisfies you, it is OK. if he does not , it means there is something fishy in t he matter. You must decide your case with a cool mind and should not jump to other so quickly as you have written. Good Luck.
I am no expert on this but i have experienced exactly the same situation as yours.
If you really do love your husband & he’s worth fighting for, then do everything that’s left in your strength to save your marriage & family.
In that tense situation at home, he’d really accuse you for meddling with his life because he’s still intensely attached with this other woman emotionally & physically.
Just keep your cool. Dont be carried away by your extreme emotions. Leave him alone but dont neglect your duties as a wife and mother.
Men usually goes back to their wives when they realize that these other women are not for good.
If he’d ask for a divorce inspite of what your did then let him go. You deserve to be happy. You deserve a real man who’d be with you for better or for worse.
You dont wanna be with an idiot & asshole for the rest of your life!
There are trust issues on both sides of your relationship. Neither one of you is communicating to one another. You’re snooping and he appears to be concealing.
Sit down, bring it up, talk it out and make a decision. COMMUNICATE.