I suspect my sister is cheating on her spouse, how do I confront her about it?
For a while now I have suspected that my beloved sister is cheating on her husband.
The biggest clue surfaced last weekend during a business trip. I called my sister on the landline to see how she was doing and I could hear noises in the background that would suggest she was not at home. When I asked her whether she was at home she said she was at home.
I am worried for my brother in law because he is an amazing man, truly in love with my sister and the two have been happily married now for 9 years.
I feel that I cannot confront my sister directly about the issue but I can’t sit back and allow my brother in law to be hurt by what I believe to be true.
What should I do?
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You know your sister better than we do, and if you think she is the sort to do something like this it might be true. Best course of action has already been suggested, but I’ll repeat it: Talk to her in private. Let her declare herself. After that, leave it alone. If she is taking risks, she is inviting consequences that go with it and is old enough to know better, so let it go. Be prepared for her wrath either way. Remember, you are only a sounding board, not an umpire. Much as it might seem unfair to withhold this from your brother in law, it is unseemly to directly interject yourself in their relationship.
Being family, I think it alright for you to at least ask her about it. As family we are supposed to be there for each other, and sometimes being there is all that is needed to help a sibling through a crisis. Good luck there.
There is nothing you can do and you shouldn’t interfere with their marriage anyway.
stay out of it look after your own life stop worrying about others
Why can’t you ask your sister? Honestly this isn’t any of your concern. Your better off not stirring up a hornets nest.
Since she is your beloved sister, you pull her to the side and in private you talk to her. Instead of demanding, just tell her about how someone that cheats not only hurts the spouse but the families. Allow her to explain then if needed standby her and offer support, to help her work through her issues. That’s what sisters do. Good luck.
Get proof first then do not tell HER, tell her husband.
If you were in the husbands place you would want to know and so would all these people who are saying not to do anything.
Gotta agree with the others. You’re talking about a suspicion, it wouldn’t matter if you had the video. Mind your own business. The rift you create between you and your sister will be greater than the rift between her and her husband when he finds out.
I am wondering how you called her on her land line but she wasn’t home?
She would not be able to take her land line with her, so she had to be at home!
What has it got to do with you? Mind your own business. Though I’m sure you won’t agree considering all the other people with similar answers have given thumbs down. if you don’t want to hear answers which are in opposition to your answer then why bother even asking.
How about minding your own business? It isn’t your place to confront her if she is cheating. She’s an ADULT and can make her own decisions, even if it is to ruin her marriage.
Get a hobby.
Sounds like you’ve got a thing for your sisters husband, trying to get your hands on him or something? you’re so obvious.
Nothing!
What you should do is mind your own business. You have no right to meddle in anyone’s personal and private life. Just because she is your sister still doesn’t give you any reason to meddle. Butt out!
Are you into her husband?
You need to stay out of it unless proof hits you over the head.
Give her my number.
Personally, I feel like I can talk to my sister about anything! It already seems as though You think you know this to be a fact! Sometimes things that look to be true can also be something entirely different. I would watch myself in how I brought this subject up to my sister. You have NO proof! Just what you THINK to be fact! You do not want to be the one who rocked her boat and it turn out to be false! That would be horrible. I understand you do not want your BIL to be hurt. I love my sisters Husbands as if they were my own brother. And I wouldn’t want them to be hurt either, However I would need concrete proof that his life is in jeopardy by her actions before I opened my BIG mouth! Just thinking and hearing something over the phone is not PROOF!
You called her on her? landline… saying she had the call forwarded? OH! That proves nothing. You need more than that to say she is cheating! How does she dress, perfumes, does she come and go to places? wherever…. doesnt really answer where she has been etc? I think you should absolutely confront her, even if it is just a feeling… Yes.
notice how all the women respond that its her sister’s private affair
but if the situation was flipped, had it be her sister being cheated on by her her brother-in-law they would have no problems on squealing on the "pig"
if a woman cheats, women will say they were issues, and he should forgive
if a man cheats, he is a stinking ‘pig’
Feminism screwed our society, no where in nature one would find a 50/50 relationship, Remember, we are animals.
let it be
Well, tell her something like this: "Hey, I know its really none of my business, but we’re sisters, and I think we’re close enough to talk about this… I was just wondering, have you been cheating? And please don’t get angry with me, its just the other night when I was on the phone with you, and you said you were home, it sounded like you weren’t, so I kind of jumped to conclusions, but I didn’t want to assume anything so I figured I might as well go the source…"
I hope that helps. I always feel like, you should never assume, and if you feel like you do need to get involved, do it. But just to a certain degree. If she admits to you that she is, you need to tell her that you don’t want to see your brother-in-law to get hurt because he’s a good guy. Just be honest, but in a polite, mature way.
Yaw girls, reread George from Miami’s take above ; that says it all…..
Leave her alone
When did you start running her life?
How would you like it, if she starts running your life?
Do nothing, Its her marriage, her husband, her issue, her problem.
Stay out of HER business!
I’m going to be blunt - it’s none of your business, and it’s not your place to be sticking your nose into theirs. Also, you might not know all of the facts about their marriage, so don’t put the husband on a pedestal. You could cause a massive rift in your family that lasts for decades, perhaps the rest of your life. Stay out of it, period.
I agree that you should stay out of it. And I would give the same advice if it was your brother and not your sister. It is her marriage. Maybe the radio was on or something? And even if she is cheating, he will probably find out anyway. Discussing it with her will only cause drama.
u only suspect, and ur sister could easily be telling the truth, those noises could be easly something simple in the back ground, tv, radio, work repairs out side and her window open, her own hubby at home with her, a friend of hers, some neighbours or even somebody who called around for chat. dont accuse ur sister of anything, u dont know anything behind it, u only heard things, could b anything with a good reason behind it - ur not her beloved sister to even think she cheat on her hubby when gave no reason in the past. maybe u secretly want her be cheating as u secretly would like her hubby to be urs, after all ur sister comes 1st not ur brother-in-law, she in ur life since day one and ur bro in law only 9yrs. mind ur own business and get on with ur own life and stop wishing ur sister would run off and cheat - shame on u for thinking like that!!!!
You should stay out of their relationship unless you are invited in to help one of them. If you have a good relationship with your sister you may suggest to her that you know she is living a lie and see if she needs someone to listen. You may not have any idea about the way things are behind the closed doors at their home. She may tell you to leave her alone and that is what you may need to do. If she is cheating then it will come out and they will have to deal with things and heal.
The same thing you would if you saw she was in a burning building. If you love your sister then you have an obligation to try to save her life. If you saw your sister was in a burning building, would you try to warn her that the building was on fire or would you just sit there and hope she figures it out for herself? Whether you want to or not you have an obligation to at least try and help your sister. After your warning, if she decides to stay in that burning building then it is on her, but at least you can go through life with a clear conscience knowing that you tried to help her. I will keep you in my prayers and pray that you have the boldness to do the right thing. Peace and God bless.
you need to realize that this is not your problem and you do not need to save your brother in law…or your sister…he may be a good man and so now you can appreciate that he can seek better…as for your sister..i hope she does not have young children while she "PLAYS"…and if she does than she may need a small reminder that those children will be history when…her ex finds out about it…so you need to move on for you and your family…i would not give your sister any face time on that issue and i would not be helpful ..child care or $ if she continued to see her new friend…i would just let her know you strongly disapprove and …move on…either way it’s a lose lose if you say anything…
no ya biz