What are some obvious signs a husband is cheating?
My husband recently lost 30+ pounds (good for him!), hasn’t worn his wedding ring in months, and has been working late a lot lately. However, every time I call him on his cell, he’s always at work (I can hear the body shop noise in the background), and he is a very strict in-Church-every-Sunday Catholic (they have strong rules about infidelity). We haven’t had sex in 2 years…and have been sleeping in separate bedrooms for 6 years. I want a divorce, but I cannot afford to live alone with a small child. I jokingly told him I"d like a divorce for our anniversary, and he told me to go ahead and get one without sounding at all upset. I"m not sure if he’s cheating or if he’s just as unhappy as I am. Financially speaking, I cannot afford to leave him; I’d just like some proof on whether or not he is cheating. How do I go about find that out?
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Tagged with: 6 years • anniversary • Background • bedrooms • body shop • Cheating Husband • divorce • Husband Cheating • infidelity • Lost • Lot • proof • signs • small child • wedding ring
Filed under: Catch A Cheater
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You need to ask him if he is seeing someone else, tell him that not sleeping in the same room for so long and no sex for 2 years makes you believe that he is really not committed to your marriage anymore. I suggest that you get a divorce, you are not happy and wither he is happy or not is not important, you are not and that should be enough to do something about it, since he is not doing anything to make you happy.
when he comes home from the casino whith loads of money
Ask him. He probably won’t admit it but what have you got to lose. You are very unhappy and deseve better in a relationship. Staying together for financial reasons is BS. Get some professional help and get on with your life. Life os too short to be wasting it away being unhappy ! Good Luck to you….
Why not just ask him if there is someone else.if you both are unhappy and you have asked him for a divorce and if he didnt care about the divorce then why are you so afraid about JUST ASKING HIM.You can either do that or wonder "what if" the rest of your life and possible not notice your soul mate out there (if it’s not your husband) cuz you are with someone else.
Good luck on this one.
Maybe hire a privite eye…but thats probably to much money.
But…If he is cheating and a private eye can prove it in a court of law, you might be able to get a generous child support ruling.
Not wearing his wedding band is not a good thing..
working late isnt either… You do get child suppport if you leave a person… and Alimony if eligible..can you stay w/a friend or a relative until you get on your feet?
Ask him
If you are not sleeping together and not having sex what do ou need a truck to run over you to see it is over?
If you hear noise in the background whenever you call him from work and he is a devout Catholic then I don’t believe he is cheating on you. Maybe ya’ll should go to counseling because it sounds like you still love him. Good Luck!
Yes, you can afford to divorce him, Child support, alimony and 50% of your marital assets and a job will set you free. With that said…
It seems to me that he is cheating. No intimacy for 2 years, him taking care of his appearnce and "working late", not wearing his wedding band and nor complaining about your mentioned of getting divorced are clear signs of him having someone else.
Other signs (in addition to the top five you already mentioned):
-Making excuses to get out of the house alone
-being anxious about being with you and just want to "go back" home.
-Phone calls at odd hours of the night or weekends
-Him not answering the phone when you are with him
-Reapeated numbers on his cellphone that you don’t recognize.
-Odd charges to the credit card
-Repeated "weekend" or "late night" tasks at "work".
_Buying new clothes, wearing cologne
-Being belligerant towards you for no reason
I belive is time for you to do some PI work. Follow him when he has another "late shift" and see where is he really going.
Good luck
separate rooms for six years and no sex for two years, he’s definitely happy with someone elses love. you can’t afford to leave him, so stay where you’re not happy.
I don’t think he’s cheating. Working late at a body shop is common when people want their cars back. I think he’s lonely and you both need to re-vitalize your marriage. Maybe he lost 30 pounds to get back his wife? Take walks with him after dinner, you both need to have some time jutst to relax with each other.
Take care and good luck.
Try calling his work directly, not his cell phone. Check his calls/text messaging on his cell phone for numbers you don’t recognize, hug him after he comes home to see if he smells like perfume, things like that. Check your credit card statements for any strange activity. To me it sounds like he is cheating. You haven’t had sex in 2 years. It’s almost guaranteed he is cheating. As far as the church is concerned. They are the biggest hypocrites of all.
Your husband is no longer interest in you… why can’t you move on your own? A lifeless marriage will not bring any happiness coz he simply not interested to be intimacy with you further. Sorry for a bit harsh but these are facts. You need to be realistic and wake up!
Frankly speaking, he is suffering too coz he maybe waiting for an appropriate timing to file divorce. Why can’t you release him and let him fly to his desire destination?
Even you had the evidences which your husband indeeds cheating behind you, what can u do to him? He will not feel remorseful neither will begging for your forgiveness. Why? Coz he has fall in love with someone else. Hence, let him go..
Here’s a real clue,
When making love, he calls you by her name.
there isnt a good way unless you have someone you know that he wouldnt recongnize there vehicle and have them follow your husband around to see where he goes after work. How old are you anyway? You can email me if youd like
sweetie if you have been sitting on the cookie for 2 years then he is getting it else where trust. sleeping in different area of the house? this is a done deal you have to think harder about moving on. Hanging on for money issues is not good even if you think it is necessary, you have to move on.
Tell you what, lady. Hard to believe, but some guys happen not to cheat, and I kinda feel close to the man you depict from outside. I have been in a similar situation with a wife who’d have been more than happy to nail down some kind of unfaithfulness from my side. I’ve also been working late, and no longer wore my ring. I didn’t take the wrong turn out of respect for my children, though. It’s rather been the other way around with my ex-wife’s personal activities, if you can see what I mean.
Why wouldn’t you give this man the respect he might deserve for a change? From here, and with what you write, looks to me he’s a mighty decent fella.
Now if you really want to see your husband as cheating, I’m quite sure you can conjure up a lot of evidence all by yourself without Yahoo readers’ help.
Girl, don’t settle for this shit. You deserve to be happy.
Sounds sooo like my husband who was cheating. He worked late, lost weight, grew his hair out and was distant emotionally and physically.
He was cheating cheating cheating. When I asked him about it aslo, he was ok with a divorce too..
Ask him to go to counseling with you, or get out.. If I can do it, you can.. and he has to pay child support to help you and your baby. You’ll be ok and you deserve to be with someone who loves you more than life itself.
He says he is cheating!!
Sounds to me like he’d might be honest, just ask. You need to just address the situation with him and see if this is what you both want. If so, then maybe you can work it out and actually still have a good relationship for your child. Doesn’t sound like he’s cheating though, just maybe not happy, like it sounds you aren’t.
does he find falt,
belittle
name call
act like he is boored when u talk
work alot of overtime
talk on his cell in another room
refuse to do things for u
u and he don’t have the conversations u once had
seem to not value u
doesn’t think your opinion is important
picks fights
is unusually kind, buying gifts,
intuition tells u there is something wrong but u can’t put your finder on what is actually wrong
drastic changes, buys new clothes, is selfish with money
blames u for every problem u have
doesn’t talk much anymore
makes excuses to go out to see friends, but stays gone for hours, completely the opposite of what he use to be like
anything u say he thinks is wrong, totally opposed to any idea, or ways to problem solve u may have, taking others parts, when they are clearly wrong.
acts agitated if u need anything from him, puts everyone else first and u last. u just aren’t a priority in his life anymore.
yes u can leave him, child support, alimoney, there are ways to do it, also get a job if u need to, as life is way too short to compete for his love.
not wanting to make love to u, means either he doesn’t find u attractive anymore, or he is getting it from someone else
In my ex husband’s case, here are a few indicators I had:
1.) He came home from work with his hands smelling like cooch, and he wasn’t a gynecologist.
2.) He came home from a night out "with the boys" and had a used condom stuck to his leg.
3.) We didn’t have sex for about 8 months and he never said a word.
4.) You usually just know.
Ah yes, the old religion beliefs. HAHAHA you know how many evil people hide in churches?? most are phony bolognies! Im not saying he’s cheating but it sounds as if you 2 have grown apart. It happens. I told my wife if we ever grow apart, we won’t fight, be mad and hate each other, we’ll just go on with life. By you sticking in a miserable marriage, you’re only hurting yourselves. Talk to him about sharing money issues if you divorce.
merry xmas
This is why I won’t have children, you never know what can happen to a couple once married.
You are paying a lot of attention to what he is doing. Are you paying any attention to yourself? Why would he cheat on you? Develop yourself - for him. if you want to keep him.
All the signs are there, If you want proof, you will have to either ask him in which case I’m sure the answer would be NO .. You could follow him, check out his cell phone, or hire a private investigator. If you don’t love him anymore and really want a divorce, I can’t see why you would care if he is cheating, except for the fault factor in a divorce.. Why he is still living at home, could be the same reason you are staying in the relationship, he doesn’t want to go through a divorce and have to pay child support etc.. It would probably be nice if you 2 could sit down and talk , If you haven’t had sex in 2 years and slept in separate bed’s for 6 yrs .. That doesn’t sound like a very stable marrage to me . Happiness, is not all about money, but it is a huge factor , but if he is cheating and depending on what state you live in, he could pay dearly, and he might know this.. Go To http://www.divorce- and put in the state you live in, It will give you a lot of answers..also http://www.cheaters.com is helpful also .. Some courts, are very strict on cheating spouses, but it’s so common now day’s some judge’s just kind of look the other way..
What’s with all these idiots telling you to ask him….cheaters NEVER own up to anything unless they are caught red handed! The trick is to NOT let him know you are on to him and start doing a little investigating……"ask him"……geez, how stupid can someone be????!
you could have him follow. check hes clothes for perfume on it.or try to show him some attention.maybe ya’ll coild work things out since you have a kid.that child is seeing everything. good luck.
Are you secretly hoping he is cheating so you get more money?
Since you say you can’t afford to leave him, and you haven’t had sex in 2 years, what difference does it make if he’s cheating or not? He’s not happy, and you know that.
What have you done to save this marriage? Why haven’t you lost weight, or done something else to enhance your appearance? Why have you been willing to go without sex for 2 years? Why have you slept in a separate bedroom for 6 years? In those six years, why haven’t you gone back to school or gotten some job training, if you want a divorce?
If your husband decides to leave you, which he most certainly should do, how are you going to support yourself? Stop sitting back, worrying about him having an affair, and do something about your situation.
Sure catholics never cheat, what planet do you live on? and why did you have an innocent child?It’s true you can’t cure stupid